It’s been four years since we first spoke. Three since we last met. It's been two weeks since we last spoke. One night, since I couldn’t keep you off my mind. I think about the first time we spoke over text. My heart was pounding out of my chest, just trying to say hello. It was almost as if my body knew what you would mean to me.

I have a confession—Mapúa Makati wasn’t my first choice. Some days, regret hits me like static across a screen. The last class ends, the hallways grow quiet, and I feel the weight of my own decision pressing down on my chest. I wasn’t forced here. I chose Mapúa myself. I turned away from Saint Benilde. And yet… I can’t help asking: Why did I settle?

There’s a particular hour where the atmosphere is uneasy, and a cold chill breeze sweeps throughout the campus; usually, that’s when the ghosts come out. It shadows everyone. It walks with me in and out of classes on the same path I’ve taken a hundred times. I have been accustomed to this kind of ghost. I sense it in the eyes of strangers and friends.

Madalang lang kitang maisip bandang ala-una Kumakain kasi ako no'n, lunch kasama tropa Pag alas dos naman, balik gawain na Susulat ng report, o babalik sa Mapúa.

I was, frankly, having a terrible day. I pulled an all-nighter to finish an assignment, fell asleep around 4 in the morning, and ended up missing my third class while I caught up on some sleep in the library. Now it's the end of the day, and it's raining. I just so happen to be one of the unlucky few who did not have an umbrella with me. It's all coming up sunshine and butterflies for me today.